Matthew Perry’s Memoir
An incredibly honest memoir about Friends, fame, and addiction.
If you’re a fan of the sitcom Friends, would like to hear stories about Hollywood fame, or understand why Matthew Perry shockingly passed away in October 2023, I recommend reading his memoir, “Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing.” It’s one of the most honest books I’ve ever read, with raw writing combining humor, vulnerability, and a talent for story telling.
Perry doesn’t hold back, and shares his journey as a kid growing up in Canada (his mom was press secretary to Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau, father of Canada’s current Prime Minister), to becoming one of the most famous actors in the world, to falling into the throes of addiction and countless rehabs.
What I like about the book is learning how Perry ended up as Chandler Bing on Friends, his well-written Hollywood stories, and learning about the disease of addiction.
Some quotes from the book that stood out to me:
1. When I was alone, I was lonely, and then when I was with people, I was lonely, too.
2. You have to get famous to know that it’s not the answer. And nobody who is not famous will ever truly believe that.
3. I think you actually have to have all of your dreams come true to realize they are the wrong dreams.
4. [about Friends]: “You can track the trajectory of my addiction if you gauge my weight from season to season—when I’m carrying weight, it’s alcohol; when I’m skinny, it’s pills. When I have a goatee, it’s lots of pills.”
5. Alcoholics hate two things: the way things are and change.
6. Addiction is like the Joker. It just wants to see the whole world burn.
7. To quote my therapist, “Reality is an acquired taste,” and I had failed to acquire it.
8. Martin Sheen turned to me and said, 'Do you know what Saint Peter says to everyone who tries to get into heaven?' When I looked blankly, the man who was once president said, 'Peter says, 'Don't you have any scars?' And when most would respond proudly, 'Well no, no I don't,' Peter says, 'Why not? Was there nothing worth fighting for?’
9. Nobody ever thinks that something really bad is going to happen to them. Until it does.
10. It is very odd to live in a world where if you died, it would shock people but surprise no one.
